Monday, January 14, 2013

Guest Post: J.B. Lynn

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

Hi! I’m Maggie Lee and my life is “challenging” to say the least. I have to contend with my crazy family. I’m the legal guardian of my little niece Katie who’s been in the hospital since the terrible car accident that killed her parents. I hate my day job. And on the side, I kill people for money.

I’m not terribly good at any of it, but I get by with a little (or a lot) of help from my friends. Let me tell you about them:

Alice: We’ve been friends since we were little kids. She’s the light to my darkness. She’s also pregnant and newly married.

Armani: Everyone needs a Work Buddy and Armani is the one who helps me get through the trying days spent taking insurance claims at Insuring the Future. Besides always trying to get me to free my  “inner-Chiquita”, Armani is a bit psychic. I’m not sure about the accuracy of her “reading” Scrabble tiles, but I know for sure her dreams tend to come true…in the most warped ways imaginable.

Doomsday/DeeDee: They say that a dog is a man’s best friend and in my case, the eighty pound Doberman who sounds like a blonde bimbo has proven herself to be a friend to me (despite her horrible grammar!).

Godzilla/God: He’s a snarky, know-it-all lizard who sounds like Professor Snape in the Harry Potter movies and has a weird obsession with Wheel of Fortune, but God is a decent sounding board and loyal friend. He’s also the World’s Smallest Henchman.

Patrick Mulligan: I’m not sure whether my murder mentor (who’s also a cop….he’s VERY complicated) really belongs on my Friends list, especially considering I’d like us to be more than friends….

Book 1: Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman

Maggie Lee is not your average hitwoman. For one thing, she's never killed anyone. For another, after hitting her head in the car accident that killed her sister, her new best friend is a talking lizard--a picky eater, obsessed with "Wheel of Fortune," that only Maggie can hear.

Maggie, who can barely take care of herself, is desperate to help her injured and orphaned niece get the best medical care possible, so she reluctantly accepts a mobster's lucrative job offer: major cash to kill his monstrous son-in-law.

Paired with Patrick Mulligan, a charming murder mentor (who happens to moonlight as a police detective), Maggie stumbles down her new career path, contending with self-doubt, three meddling aunts, a semi-psychic friend predicting her doom, and a day job she hates. Oh, and let's not forget about Paul Kowalski, the sexy beat cop who could throw her ass in jail if he finds out what she's up to.

Training has never been so complicated And, this time, Maggie has to get the job done. Because if she doesn't . . . she's the mob's next target.

Book 2: Further Confessions of Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman

Take three wacky aunts, two talking animals, one nervous bride, and an upcoming hit, and you've got the follow-up to JB Lynn's wickedly funny Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman

Knocking off a drug kingpin was the last thing on Maggie Lee's to-do list, but when a tragic accident leaves her beloved niece orphaned and in the hospital, Maggie will go to desperate lengths to land the money needed for her care.

But the drug kingpin is the least of her worries. Maggie's aunts are driving her crazy, her best friend's turned into a bridezilla…and a knock on the head has given Maggie Dr. Dolittle abilities—she can talk to animals. Unfortunately, they talk back.

Here are some upcoming events!!!!

Ali Talks Live - Jan. 7 at 8 pm

Chat at Goodreads Jan. 10

About the Author:
Besides being a writer, JB Lynn is a compulsive reader, a runner (of sorts), an enthusiastic cook (who doesn't get the appeal of the Food Network), and someone who has an irresistible urge to eavesdrop at all times.

JB has a great love of her husband, dogs, coffee, purple ink, spiral notebooks, running gear, hot showers, and '80s music. Given enough time, all of these things will eventually show up in her books.

You can find J.B. Lynn online:

And of course, here is where you can get your very own copy!!
Book 1

Book 2


  1. Thanks so much for having me, Alli!

    1. Oh, no, thank you for Guest Staring today! Come by anytime!

  2. I love all of your friends, Maggie! These books wouldn't be the same without them. =o)

  3. I'm so glad you didn't ask us to pick our favorite of your friends, Maggie. (And JB! ;) ) You make me laugh and cry, often at the same time. We need to hit the olive bar and martinis someday. Any hint on when the next part of your story will see the light of day? Inquiring minds (and fans!) want to know.

  4. B.E. -- Maggie's friends (much like mine) are awesome....quirky, but awesome!

    Silver -- Rumor has it that you'll only have to wait a couple of months....